“Often we find it easier to think our way around things rather than to feel our way through them:”
― Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening:
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The rhododendrons bloom as the eagles fly, and the rowers are back on the lake. I wonder how many springs I have left, and quickly let that idea drop. Choosing instead to just feel all the feelings without barriers.
“We begin to find and become ourselves when we notice how we are already found,
already truly, entirely, wildly, messily, marvelously who we were born to be.”
― Anne Lamott
April arrives bringing with it beautiful signs of spring. I emerge myself in cherry trees and daffodils, not wanting to miss a single sign of her awakening. I work most days in the garden, weeding and planting new flowers and getting the vegetable garden ready to plant. We celebrate Brandon’s birthday, all of us gathered for dinner, and I marvel at the man he has become. There is a grand Easter egg hunt with the neighborhood kids, where we meet new people who bring us into their fold without question, and I find myself feeling pretty settled in this place we now call home. Percy and I take long walks on Tuesdays and I teach him the names of all the flowers popping up in the neighborhood gardens. We watch for eagles and look for bugs and I once again count my blessings.
***
“But unless things are seen with fresh eyes,” he added, “nothing’s worth writing down.”
― Jane Hirshfield, The Heart of Haiku
***
He watches the eagles that sour above the lake. It is a five eagle day Gramma, he says joyfully. I wonder if the eagles have always done this, or if it something new this spring. My guess is I just never paid attention, for this is not the first time he has opened my eyes to the beauty around me. Fresh eyes I say to him! Later I make fried rice for dinner and watch as Baker licks up the rice I have spilled here and there on the floor. Sometimes the simplicity of joy surprises me.
“In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt.”― Margaret Atwood, Bluebeard's Egg
breakfast
bits and pieces of the past few days … I don’t have any wise words today, other than to tell you to just get outside, take a walk, or a nap, discover something beautiful, and do your best to stay away from the news
robin
birdbath
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sunbathing
the dogwood
Many years ago a friend gave me a few chunks of forget me nots. She dug them up with a small trowel after I admired them in her garden, sending me home with some of my own. I planted small clumps of them throughout my garden, where they flourished for years. When we moved, six years ago in the early fall, I thought I had left them all behind. But that first spring I spotted a few scattered here and there. This is their sixth season here in this garden close to the sea, and I am happy to say they are everywhere.
Sadly, a few years ago I got news that my friend had passed away. But come spring I see her everywhere in this garden of mine.
***